Without You (Working Title)
by loosaluver1138
Summary: What happens to Mr. Rochester after Jane leaves? This fic is from his POV. Please R&R!


AN: This is my first attempt at a Jane Eyre fanfic. My thanks to Mrs. Dresser for "forcing" us to read such a wonderful book (not to mention beta reading it!)  
  
Disclaimer: All characters and situations were created by Charlotte Bronte, a far better writer than I.  
  
To: My fellow Eyre-heads (Helen, Diana and Adele)  
  
From: Jane!  
  
Xx*xX Without You (Working Title) Xx*xX  
  
1 Gone. Oh, how I despised the word, despised the fact that my beloved Jane had vanished. Sunlight poured into her vacated room where I now stood. I cursed the sun vehemently. How dare it shine with such energy when Jane was not by my side? True, she had planned to depart Thornfield Hall, as hastily as she could, but then I would know where she was. I would have been able to say farewell. Instead, she had vanished, leaving behind all her possessions, save her purse, a locket, some linen, and one ring. Not one word of explanation did she leave, not even a goodbye letter. Presently, my stunned anguish transformed itself into blind rage. Anger not towards Jane, but towards my own stupidity.  
  
"I should never have gotten myself involved with her. I should have simply kept our relationship a friendship. Perhaps then she would still be here by my side." An idea struck me, and I whirled around and flew down the corridor, away from Jane's chamber. "She headed for Millcote, most likely, tried to find a carriage to take her away from here. She may still be there now."  
  
2 Mesrour was saddled in record time. I mounted him, whistling for Pilot who took the lead in front of me as we raced toward Millcote. "I hope I'm not too late." Never before had I ridden at such velocity, and I never shall again. Thornfield's grounds went by in a jumble of color, but I took no notice. My conscience was filled with memories of the day before.  
  
3 I recalled waiting outside her oddly silent apartment, expecting to hear sobs, but no sound was omitted. When at last she quitted the room, I had confronted her, imploring her for forgiveness, trying in vain to persuade her to stay with me, but we both knew that she would never allow it.  
  
4 "Farewell!" she had cried. "Farewell forever!"  
  
Her words pierced my very being. They destroyed my last hope, shattered my dreams, both of them laid waste beyond the chance of recovery.  
  
The buildings of Millcote rose up before me, and I pulled my horse to a stop on the edge of the village. He champed at the bit, on the verge of collapse from exhaustion. Pilot came loping up the lane behind us, panting hard. I had not even noticed that he had not been able to keep up. I leaped from the horse, pausing long enough to tie him before taking to the streets. Though I searched every street and alley, my Jane was nowhere to be found.  
  
"Is this how she would leave me?" fumed I. "How dare she flee, vanish without a trace? Perhaps she has not gone far, maybe just to the next town over. Potentially, I could intercept her before she can get out of my reach." I dismissed the thought quickly. Poor Mesrour would scarcely be able to get me home at a walk, much less make it to another town in time. There was nothing I could do. Jane, my joy, my love, my second self, was gone.  
  
Tears welled in my eyes as I remounted Mesrour and rode toward Thornfield. The dark clouds that hung overhead dappled the roads. Sunlight tried and failed to overcome them, leaving the woods in gloomy darkness. I drew to a stop when I came to the small stone wall where Mesrour had slipped that one fateful evening. I blinked hard, staring to the side of the road, half-expecting Jane to be seated there, ready to assist me when my horse fell. Despite my silent prayers, the wall remained vacated. I was forced to acknowledge with a heavy heart that no amount of staring would return my darling Jane to me.  
  
The thought was too much for me to bear. I surrendered myself to the bitter tears that lay waiting in my eyes. A swift jab with my heels sent the horse into a canter, putting distance between the cursed clearing and myself.  
  
We trotted quickly through the gardens of Thornfield, riding swiftly past the crippled chestnut tree. I jumped from the saddle at the door, leaving Mesrour in the care of the stable hand. I stormed through the door and Paced quickly toward my chamber. Mrs. Fairfax fell into stride behind my, followed by Adele.  
  
"Ah, monsieur! Elle est allée! Elle a fait la parole de NT même au revoir! Retournera-t-elle jamais?" Adele cried.  
  
"I do not know, child! Be off with you! Leave me be!" I shouted. "Mrs. Fairfax, take her away. I wish to be alone."  
  
"But sir." she started, but I would not allow her to finish. I gripped the smooth handle of my door.  
  
"I said take her away!" With that, I slammed the heavy door in her face, bolting it from the inside. I busied myself with drawing the drapes and closing the shutters. Only after the last window was secured did I find my way over to the bed. I threw myself down onto it, burying my face deep in the bedclothes. Sobs drowned out everything around me, smothering me in misery.  
  
After a time, I composed myself enough to cry out to god above. "Why must I take one more breath? How can I live another day without my beloved Jane by y side? I must know where she is, whom she is with. Oh, where is Jane Eyre?" Despair overwhelmed me then, and I relapsed back into weeping. I could have cried for hours in this manner, but a fitful sleep engulfed me, and I remembered nothing more.  
  
  
  
Xx*xX End Chapter 1 Xx*xX  
  
There's more to come, most likely after the holidays. Keep checking back! 


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